I got married a month before I turned 21. Do you know the average age for a woman to get married today?
27.
That's right, there is a second grader between me and the average woman.
That's not to say I'm better, or worse than a woman who does, but it does mean that by the time that average women does marry, I will be in my 7th year of marriage.
I also graduated a semester early from college, when it is less than common to finish "on time" in 4 years. This is also not to brag, I just happened to know what I wanted, and was blessed with scholarships that I didn't want to waste.
And I got married before I graduated. *GASP*!!!
As I said, none of this is to show that I'm better than anyone else (the more you read this blog, the more you will realize the opposite!), it's just want to point out how few people my age can relate to my life. Which makes it hard. And lonely.
It's a weird stage.
We won't be having any children for at least a few years (because hey! I'm only 21), so it's likely I will feel like this for a good long while. A lot of couples wait less than a year to conceive. Husband and I want to be able to have a stable, strong relationship before children come in to the picture. Our priorities will be right, and children will never be the center of our world or marriage. This also sets us a part. Many young/newly married couples already have children, so the pool of "those that I can relate to" gets even smaller.
I'm 21, married, done with college, with no kids in the picture.
So if there is anyone out there that (actually read this) and can relate...thoughts?
Thursday, January 8, 2015
Tuesday, January 6, 2015
Back On Pointe
Getting back into shape!
I've always been pretty small. I'm 5'1 and small-boned, so weight was never much of an issue for me (except when I was 15, but what 15-year old girl doesn't think she's fat??). I ran cross country all of high school, and rowed my freshman year of college, so Freshman 15 was never a thing for me. While I was never "overweight" I never was super skinny either. Just pretty normal, for my frame. But as my rowing days were far behind me, womanhood caught up with me. My body began to grow up, like all women do, and my frame got a little bigger. I slowly got a little softer, but I didn't gain more than 10 pounds.
That is, until I got married. My husband is a big, tall man's man, and he loves to eat. So I guess, I just started to eat more with him. I would try to exercise every once or so, maybe twice a month. But we ate out more and more, and I was too stressed with my last semester of school to cook much. Within 5 months, I had gained 20 pounds! That might not be much to someone who is 5'9, or even 5'5, but for someone as short as me, that's 15-20% of my body weight!
For 3 months, I've tried, to no real avail, at getting back into shape. I know numbers aren't everything, but I want to be healthy! I'd only lost about 3 pounds (thanks, Christmas), but with school over, there is much less on my plate. I have fallen in love with cooking! I haven't done anything radical, mostly just slow-cooking (my crock pot is my best friend!), but I've just started cooking more meats, less pasta-y carb-y stuff. I cheat my veggies by only eating the ones I like, like bell peppers, onions (do those count?), and green beans. I've tried to drink more water, because that's what we're supposed to drink, right?
If you're anything like me, you like to spend some time on the "Health and Fitness" Pinterest section to get motivated enough to work out. I found several good (let's face it, the pictures were pretty) workout plans, and realized they all came from the same website!
What I love about these workouts is that there are tons of them, so I can never get bored by doing the same thing! If I'm in the mood to work on my legs, I chose one of those, or abs, arms, etc. I also love that there are a bunch of different exercises, so I'm not just doing a bunch of squats or sit-ups. Variety is key with me!
I've always been pretty small. I'm 5'1 and small-boned, so weight was never much of an issue for me (except when I was 15, but what 15-year old girl doesn't think she's fat??). I ran cross country all of high school, and rowed my freshman year of college, so Freshman 15 was never a thing for me. While I was never "overweight" I never was super skinny either. Just pretty normal, for my frame. But as my rowing days were far behind me, womanhood caught up with me. My body began to grow up, like all women do, and my frame got a little bigger. I slowly got a little softer, but I didn't gain more than 10 pounds.
That is, until I got married. My husband is a big, tall man's man, and he loves to eat. So I guess, I just started to eat more with him. I would try to exercise every once or so, maybe twice a month. But we ate out more and more, and I was too stressed with my last semester of school to cook much. Within 5 months, I had gained 20 pounds! That might not be much to someone who is 5'9, or even 5'5, but for someone as short as me, that's 15-20% of my body weight!
For 3 months, I've tried, to no real avail, at getting back into shape. I know numbers aren't everything, but I want to be healthy! I'd only lost about 3 pounds (thanks, Christmas), but with school over, there is much less on my plate. I have fallen in love with cooking! I haven't done anything radical, mostly just slow-cooking (my crock pot is my best friend!), but I've just started cooking more meats, less pasta-y carb-y stuff. I cheat my veggies by only eating the ones I like, like bell peppers, onions (do those count?), and green beans. I've tried to drink more water, because that's what we're supposed to drink, right?
If you're anything like me, you like to spend some time on the "Health and Fitness" Pinterest section to get motivated enough to work out. I found several good (let's face it, the pictures were pretty) workout plans, and realized they all came from the same website!
What I love about these workouts is that there are tons of them, so I can never get bored by doing the same thing! If I'm in the mood to work on my legs, I chose one of those, or abs, arms, etc. I also love that there are a bunch of different exercises, so I'm not just doing a bunch of squats or sit-ups. Variety is key with me!
I also love that I can do as many sets as I want. If I'm feeling good about it, I may do 3, or if I'm not feeling it, I just do one. A little movement is better than no movement! Another thing about the exercising, is small steps. Like my cooking, if I do too much, I burn out. So just these exciting workouts, and a little more movement during the day.
Another key thing for working out that I love with these is that I can do them at any time of the day. And I can do them anywhere! They don't take up much space, and it even works in our tiny apartment! Sometimes I don't get around to it till 9pm, but at least I'm moving! If you live in an apartment or dorm room, these workouts don't make much noise (unless you're huffing and puffing like crazy!).
So there really is no excuse, which is saying something from the master excuse-maker. Our bodies don't last forever, but God has given us these beautiful, magical bodies, and He expects us to use everything He has provided us to serve His Kingdom. Most diseases and sickness today are caused by lifestyle. If we don't take care of our bodies, how can we be used to the max if were too exhausted, or sick?
One day at a time.
In Christ.
Sunday, January 4, 2015
Reviving the Blog!
In an attempt to maintain regularity in my blogging, I am going to *try* to expand my topics of blogging.
- My escapades in teaching myself how to cook and feed a large hungry man
- Things God is teaching my in all my mess (my usual posts)
- "Book Reviews" on the books I read this year
- My *attempts* at getting healthy, and anything that I find actually works
- Successful and failed Pinterest projects, recipes, etc.
- Updates on our life and marriage
- Basically anything I find interesting
Here's to a new year!
In Christ.
Thursday, January 1, 2015
God in the Waiting.
(This is my typical, "It's the new year, let's try to blog more" post.)
The first day of 2015 didn't look like what I expected. I expected to have moved to North Carolina already, cooking tons of food in a big(ger) kitchen in a new home while Husband and his friends sat back and enjoyed my food and some football. I thought I would be 20 pounds lighter than I was in October when I started attempting to lose my marriage weight. I thought I would feel more accomplished from graduating college than I do. I thought I would get to see more of my husband. I thought I would be ten times more spiritual than I was last January 1 (because I got married, which, of course, solves all of life's problems...). I thought I'd be starting our new life with new friends, job, church and home.
Instead, we spent the Eve and Day alone, grocery shopped (pretty exhilarating stuff here), cooked dinner in a cramped (seriously, you can barely fit one person in there) kitchen, and busted massive amounts of glass in said kitchen while listening to our loud neighbors above us. The house was a mess, with Christmas presents and more stuff still piled up in every place. (I have to say though, it was nice to actually spend the DAY with Husband, because he usually sleeps all day and works at night.) To my engaged friends, this is real marriage stuff here.
When God promises something, it makes it really hard to wait for it. Back in August, God made it pretty clear to Husband and I that the next step for our marriage was to move to Raleigh, get jobs, a house, join The Summit Church and serve there. It was a step closer to our shared dream of missions. A dream God had placed in each of us long ago. We assumed the move would be in December, once I finished school. My closest friend was simultaneously called to move to the Research Triangle for school, and she is already there. So I feel my heart increasingly ache for the call God has promised us to.
With the weeks passing, the money waning, and no job prospects despite hours of research, we get nothing. No job? No house. No getting out of our cramped apartment lease. No move. We know it will happen, and we trust this, but it is discouraging. I feel like life is on hold. It's like we don't fit here anymore, like Florida has already filled in our absence. I don't want to make any investments or commitments here, when we could move any week now. The same well-intended questions are exhausting. I long for a house big enough to fit more than a love seat. A home where friends and strangers alike can be welcomed in with warm coffee and good food. Not a whole lot, just enough for that. As of now, we can only accommodate one extra, and it makes my heart ache.
The truth is, though, as bland as life is waiting, God is here. God has predestined us for a perfect timing. He will provide a job for us because he said he would. He will provide a home that we need when we need it. He will provide the moving costs despite our bank account. Because his call is sure. Because he needs us here for now. And when he wants us there, we will be there.
I remember that David waited 12 years after being called to be crowned king. I remember that Moses waited in the desert for 40 years, then another 40 in the wilderness. I remember that Joseph was enslaved and rot in jail until he became a prince. I remember that Abraham's promise was not fulfilled for almost 4 millennia. I remember that both Sarah and Elizabeth were almost A CENTURY before they bore a child. Half of Paul's missionary life was waiting. Christ's whole life was basically just waiting for his death. The whole bible is basically about waiting; waiting for the Messiah, then waiting for him to come back. I can wait another month or two.
The longer I wait, the more God reveals to me my own sin in His call. We haven't even moved yet, and I am already coveting a glorious kitchen, finding my approval in new friends loving my hospitality, and a dissatisfied heart with all that God has given me already. I postpone spiritual growth until we can go to a church "good enough for me" (how snobby can I be??). I do the bare minimum because I think I can. I suppose the longer he makes me wait, the more refined I will be when we do move.
The more dissatisfied I get with life in the waiting, the more eager I seek Him. And maybe that's why he makes us wait sometimes. Every lonely night when Husband works till dawn, I long harder for our Maker. Every time I wish we had a small group to spend time with, I long for the fulfillment of Christ as my Friend (not to be cheesy). When I long for peers in our stage of life, it makes me pray harder for those we will have before we meet them. Every time I worry about the costs of moving, I look at the "Jehovah Jireh" tattoo on my left wrist, and remember my Provider. Every time I'm tempted (I always fail at this one) to compare our home church to the church we are moving for, I remember that no church is perfect. Every time I feel disgruntled by my list of complaints here, I remember all I need and all I have been given, and that the list is likely to grow, not shrink, in moving.
Waiting isn't really waiting at all. When we move, we won't have "arrived". There will be a whole new level of problems for us to tackle. Our perfect little life won't be. If I'm not content here, I won't be there. If I'm not seeking Christ here, I won't there. If I'm not being hospitable here, I won't there. If I'm not building relationships here, I won't there. If I'm not working on being healthy here, I won't there. If I'm not grateful here, I won't be there. Waiting is just simply the end of a part of life, nearing the next one. Let this stage end. Let this stage be it's own. Work where you are, then work where you will be. The next stage won't fix me. I won't fix me. Only Christ can. And I need to obey him at all moments, no matter what I expect.
In Christ.
The first day of 2015 didn't look like what I expected. I expected to have moved to North Carolina already, cooking tons of food in a big(ger) kitchen in a new home while Husband and his friends sat back and enjoyed my food and some football. I thought I would be 20 pounds lighter than I was in October when I started attempting to lose my marriage weight. I thought I would feel more accomplished from graduating college than I do. I thought I would get to see more of my husband. I thought I would be ten times more spiritual than I was last January 1 (because I got married, which, of course, solves all of life's problems...). I thought I'd be starting our new life with new friends, job, church and home.
Instead, we spent the Eve and Day alone, grocery shopped (pretty exhilarating stuff here), cooked dinner in a cramped (seriously, you can barely fit one person in there) kitchen, and busted massive amounts of glass in said kitchen while listening to our loud neighbors above us. The house was a mess, with Christmas presents and more stuff still piled up in every place. (I have to say though, it was nice to actually spend the DAY with Husband, because he usually sleeps all day and works at night.) To my engaged friends, this is real marriage stuff here.
When God promises something, it makes it really hard to wait for it. Back in August, God made it pretty clear to Husband and I that the next step for our marriage was to move to Raleigh, get jobs, a house, join The Summit Church and serve there. It was a step closer to our shared dream of missions. A dream God had placed in each of us long ago. We assumed the move would be in December, once I finished school. My closest friend was simultaneously called to move to the Research Triangle for school, and she is already there. So I feel my heart increasingly ache for the call God has promised us to.
With the weeks passing, the money waning, and no job prospects despite hours of research, we get nothing. No job? No house. No getting out of our cramped apartment lease. No move. We know it will happen, and we trust this, but it is discouraging. I feel like life is on hold. It's like we don't fit here anymore, like Florida has already filled in our absence. I don't want to make any investments or commitments here, when we could move any week now. The same well-intended questions are exhausting. I long for a house big enough to fit more than a love seat. A home where friends and strangers alike can be welcomed in with warm coffee and good food. Not a whole lot, just enough for that. As of now, we can only accommodate one extra, and it makes my heart ache.
The truth is, though, as bland as life is waiting, God is here. God has predestined us for a perfect timing. He will provide a job for us because he said he would. He will provide a home that we need when we need it. He will provide the moving costs despite our bank account. Because his call is sure. Because he needs us here for now. And when he wants us there, we will be there.
I remember that David waited 12 years after being called to be crowned king. I remember that Moses waited in the desert for 40 years, then another 40 in the wilderness. I remember that Joseph was enslaved and rot in jail until he became a prince. I remember that Abraham's promise was not fulfilled for almost 4 millennia. I remember that both Sarah and Elizabeth were almost A CENTURY before they bore a child. Half of Paul's missionary life was waiting. Christ's whole life was basically just waiting for his death. The whole bible is basically about waiting; waiting for the Messiah, then waiting for him to come back. I can wait another month or two.
The longer I wait, the more God reveals to me my own sin in His call. We haven't even moved yet, and I am already coveting a glorious kitchen, finding my approval in new friends loving my hospitality, and a dissatisfied heart with all that God has given me already. I postpone spiritual growth until we can go to a church "good enough for me" (how snobby can I be??). I do the bare minimum because I think I can. I suppose the longer he makes me wait, the more refined I will be when we do move.
The more dissatisfied I get with life in the waiting, the more eager I seek Him. And maybe that's why he makes us wait sometimes. Every lonely night when Husband works till dawn, I long harder for our Maker. Every time I wish we had a small group to spend time with, I long for the fulfillment of Christ as my Friend (not to be cheesy). When I long for peers in our stage of life, it makes me pray harder for those we will have before we meet them. Every time I worry about the costs of moving, I look at the "Jehovah Jireh" tattoo on my left wrist, and remember my Provider. Every time I'm tempted (I always fail at this one) to compare our home church to the church we are moving for, I remember that no church is perfect. Every time I feel disgruntled by my list of complaints here, I remember all I need and all I have been given, and that the list is likely to grow, not shrink, in moving.
Waiting isn't really waiting at all. When we move, we won't have "arrived". There will be a whole new level of problems for us to tackle. Our perfect little life won't be. If I'm not content here, I won't be there. If I'm not seeking Christ here, I won't there. If I'm not being hospitable here, I won't there. If I'm not building relationships here, I won't there. If I'm not working on being healthy here, I won't there. If I'm not grateful here, I won't be there. Waiting is just simply the end of a part of life, nearing the next one. Let this stage end. Let this stage be it's own. Work where you are, then work where you will be. The next stage won't fix me. I won't fix me. Only Christ can. And I need to obey him at all moments, no matter what I expect.
In Christ.
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